After a 2 year break, ambush interview is back!!!

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GFY Ambush Interview thread MediaGuy

Question #1
Which do you prefer, jail or the drunk tank? discuss in detail.

LOL that starts things off right... well it might depend on what country you're in. I was in a tank in Illinois when cops busted a t-shirt trunkshop at a Grateful Dead show and being incensed, under the influences, and all hippied out methinks I did protest too much...

But it's damn uncomfortable and they just toss you in with as many scary muthers as they can...

Jail is another thing entirely. More comfortable by a stretch lol. I was in because I broke curfew on a conditional release pertaining to a "domestic violence" charge brought against me by my wife at the time in a rage of anger. Funny, the way cops think. You're bloody & battered, but you get the charge 'cause you're the guy (and she's pissed).

I was only in for the rest of my sentence, about a month. At that point, that was the longest I'd been apart from my kids - who are the best things in my life, and so make it that I can't regret the marriage, despite the cuts & bruises.

Question #
Just how humiliating can playing on a peewee hockey team be?

Imagine you don't want to play hockey, you don't care about sports (except tackle football in he mud) and you don't really skate so well... then you wrap on pads, armour, oversized jockstrap, and you're shoved out on the ice.

And you don't know the rules too clearly, don't know the flow of the game, never sure which end the puck is heading to, never know why and when you should be on the bench or on the ice...

And you fall on your ass, on your face, and another guys' stick all in the same game, almost score on your own goal.

Imagine then your parents and your girlfriend's parents (well she wanted to be my girlfiend and kinda stalked me the way 8 year old girls can) yelling to cheer you and yelling less and less... and all the parents yelling and angry (at everyone on the ice, at the coaches, at the referree) more and more...

I hung up the jockstrap after about fifteen minutes.

I think my mom thought it would be a good idea to get me to integrate, be a team player, not to be so independent and a reader/geek/nerd or something...


Question #3

Is it true youíre a writer?

Yes it is.

I haven't produced anything for a few years, and all my writing needs seem satisfied by writing html and stuff, which is like another language with its structure, syntax and such.

But when I was freelancing I was coming up with some good stuff, got published in some sci-fi and horror mags, plus I did a lot of articles and interviews and travel pieces (mostly to subsidize those trips to the Grateful Dead tours) and covered the microbrewerie scene in Quebec for Beer magazine.

My biggest coup was an interview with Jerry Garcia... for Banjo magazine. It got republished in Relix, of course, and none other than Sandy Rothman himself said that it was the seminal or most significant article on Jerry and the instrument available.


Question #
Did your sisterís passing away from breast cancer have anything to do with the over the top drunk episodes at many porn conventions youíre famous for?

What?!? WTF man good thing I'm not a sensitive guy that way ...

I might have to answer this in multi post... because there is no connection, correlation or relevance to the two there... lol

My sister was always the one of we two siblings who did the right thing. She didn't drink, do drugs, abuse any one thing from sweets to coffee. She ate right, balanced her meat intake, drank bottled water, ended up with an idealic, bucolic life married to a dairy farmer in Quebec's Beauce region, and was happy as a farmwife and mother - she had three beautiful kids.

And then she got cancer.

I don't know what to make of that on a moral, cosmological and even scientific/health basis. It made me about as angry during her treatment, recovery and relapse as it made me sad at her death. It just doesn't make sense...

OH I just got the sense of your question, Sleazy!! Sorry for my comments earlier... damn, it's possible the drinking excess was tied to those feelings somehow, and the whole situation of my relationship/marriage turning to shit, and all that happy crap back then... fuck, I'm going to have to think about that...

Thanks for the question! I might be back on this later...

Question #
Why do you destroy keyboards?

Because I smack keys too hard when I type. I trained myself typing on a cool little portable Olivetti manual (yes, I lived in an age before PCs). Typed a lot of stuff on it and believe me there's a hell of a difference between someone who learned on the modern "airboards" and the old typewriters. If I didn't have one of these rock-solid, super-heavy clicking-key IBM keyboards that let me feel when I've clicked the letter/key home, then I'd have to work with a spare nearby. Takes a couple months and my modern keyboards are garbage.

Question #
Talk about Jerry Garcia and the producer of the original Twilight Zone series.

Well basically me and my travelling & writing partner, a guy called Andrew who is one of the best friends I ever had, wanted to interview Jerry, after admiring his work for so many years... So I came up with a plan - I wrote to the banjo magazine and said basically, "In our correspondence with Mr Garcia's management, he has expressed a great interest in being interviewed on his favorite instrument at last for your magazine..." etc...

Then we wrote to Grateful Dead management and said basically the same thing, "In our correspence with Banjo Newsletter, the editors... " etc...

So of course, if they could get it on spec, especially, the editors wrote back saying they would be very interested...

One day a couple months after I mailed the letter, I got a phone call while I was playing chess and sipping some homemade Sicilian wine with another friend, and basically the only thing the guy said after introducing himself as the Dead's publicist was "Jerry would LOVE to!!"

I nearly fell on my ass, and not from the wine.

So we planned a huge trek across America and Mexico to be able to end up in California on the specified date. It was awesome, we did east coast, the south, louisiana and Texas, then veered south to the Baja to find the epicentre of the longest solar eclipse in our generation, then humped it back up the west coast.

Jerry was cool. He was drinking grape juice and root beer from bottles that looked like wine and beer, heh, and was clean, hadn't touched heroine and was back steady on the insulin. We were all pretty nervous and even forgot to turn on the mic on the tape recorder at one point, but it came out great.

The interview isn't online I don't think but Rothman quotes extensively from it in his Jerry Garcia piece "The Banjo Years"

#6 part two: the Twilight Zone producer...

This was my first "break" story and has nothing to do with Jerry Garcia hah...

I was just in my twenties and snagging jobs working as a grip, gaffer or gofer on movie sets around Montreal. At one makeshift production office set up in a basement in old Montreal (I always seem to veer back to the Old City....) for what turned out to be a really bad movie (or so they said; I never saw it).

But I saw this name listed as producer, Buck Houghton... and it jangled a bell... so I did some research (pre-Google, Wikipedia or IMDB, remember) and realized I'd seen his name at the beginning of nary every episode of Rod Serling's Twilight Zone series while I was growing up (and probably as early as the week before).

So I contacted and snared an interview with the venerable old movie vet and managed to sell it to Starlog magazine. Still have a photocopy of that check, and copies of that issue somewhere...

For those geeks in the know, it was in the special summer issue that featured the veggie-gremlin from Gremlins II on the cover...

That's about it! Oh, and Starlog only took it after Twilight Zone magazine turned it down - wtf?!?

Question #
Whatís so great about being a strip club DJ?

Ultimately nothing really... everyone I knew crashed and burned out of it lol.

It was fun, though, and it's more of an MC job than a DJ job.

Again, I came in on the cusp - of the CD revolution, so at first it was a turntable dance, spinning disks, cueing and synching and announcing all at once. I had a great Frank Zappa/Herb Tarleck voice and dancers loved my individualized styles of announcing for each one...

Then CDs came in and the job got pretty boring on some levels.

But five nights a week is too much, and too long at it drives down your enthusiasm. You still sound the same, but the feeling's not there. People and dancers sense it. So ya gotta be the guy even when you don't feel like it, and you take a line of coke here, a beer there, and it just turns into your morning coffee... not a good habit to get into.

But to answer your question, what's great about it is the constant action, the all-night boogie, sorta guiding the mood of the evening to a pitch, orchestrating it like a conductor when you can.

I especially enjoyed the high tension nights with special shows, like bachelor events, hockey or post-concert nights (the only nights the boss would let us play Black Sabbath and heavier metal bands), as well as some features like Stephanie Evans' shows (she's the Alice Cooper snake chick).

Not a carreer and not one you stick to once you have babies...

Question #

Yeah, hippies... like many things American I have a love/hate relationship with hippies.

On the one hand, this whole sense of human community, and support, and big cuddly hugginess...

I remember just trudging across this dry farmlot populated with 45,000 cars in Kansas at a Dead show. And these self-appointed watchers of dehydration with a spritzer bottle full from a cooler full of ice spraying me as I passed on the way to the facilities. It was a purely gratuitious act of kindness and compassion.

And any time any one needed that and some support, they almost didn't have to ask. It was acceptance and sharing on a kind level... it was relief from the intolerant, judgmental conservative mentality (which is in itself judgmenta on my part) I encountered all too often in the US.

It's funny 'cause Hippies treated me the same very often on first meeting me. I was bald. They thought I was a narc. My buddy was a long-hair, but still... we often saw one "real" cop narc with no hair and some poor schmuck from the drunk tank acting as his hippie "legitimizer" at Dead shows, sitting in a repo'ed VW bus smoking "stuff" that was fruit resin from a "bong" and saying it was "good shit", etc etc...

But the community was strong and wise and stuck together nicely.

But sometimes the whole "Heey Maaan" patchouli barefoot dirty smelly thing just got to be too much of a geek thing to me, so I craved crooner lounges and straight people, and my baldness always helped with that 

When I got into adult I encountered the same spirit - the same communal "Us against Them" thing that, though we might have our beefs against each other, though we may compete in the same niches and media, keeps us bound somehow since we're all we've got, after us, it's the sharks, the mainstream, the FBI, the church committee or the neighbourhood decency squad, whatever...

I remember one fine moment after the Ashcroft version of 2257 when JD Obenberger at Qwebec Expo referred to the adult industry as the frontline in the fight for freedom of expression. I was a proud porn guy then.

Good morning GFY, btw :P

Question #
Whatís the oldest cat you ever knew?

The oldest cat wasn't no cougar (wink, yeha you know who) but just a regular housecat I got when he was 1 and I was eleven.

I named him Jack because the minute my sister brought him home (she was always bringing home stray cats, but this one was going to be put down by the local pet shop for being too old for their inventory so they sold it to my sister for a dollar), it adopted me, and was lying on my belly while I was reading an interview with Jack Nicholson and watching a documentary on Jack the Ripper, when the wind slammed the door shut and the cat JUMPED off me, ripping into my skin with its back claws... go gifure. I named him Jack.

So yeah I had that cat until it was 26 or 27, when it kinda wandered off into the wild back alleys of Montreal, where he sorta reigned as a scourge to both toms and stupid, curious dogs, to die, i figure. Heard it was a cat "thing", that.

He was a pretty groovy animal, very gentle, intelligent, and civilized even. I mean, he would do stuff like dip his paw into a cup of milk to drink it, draining off any excess in the cup before he licked away... little things.

Anyhow I have a great picture of my daughter at 6 or 8 months, when we had a pro over for some Classic Baby pics with Cassandre in her little dress and all that, and during the session that big old cat, who loved her very much, was wondering what was up, so he hopped up onto the cushion next to where she was sitting. So I have this great picture of them, well taken, that is forever.

Actually, "Jack" was also my daughter's first word, before even daddy ("da" doesn't count).

Question #
How did you get involved with 2much?

Basically I've known Mark Prince since high school, around September 1980. We actually took "Data Processing" classes and learned how to enter data by making little holes in punchcards, frack me!

I knew him when he started his BBS he hosted on his home TRS 80, called "Datamate". People posted to each other and got to know each other and arranged GTs or Get-Togethers and even instant-messaged each other live.

Pretty impressive, but I wasn't so techy and the first time I got a computer was years later, a 386 IBM clone running MS DOS and a word processor!! I had joined the technological revolution and stopped typing on typewriters :P

Anyhow we went our separate ways when I ended up married and living in farmland, but he started contacting me about commissioning scripts for video projects for the web. I had experience in writing in general, and did some script doctoring at some point so I knew what he wanted without him explaining it.

And, since I had shooting and editing experience, he would get me to come down, learn the new tools and cut those together, driving down to Montreal on Friday and back three hours both ways to get back to the farm Monday morning at 5:00 AM.

Seeing what could be done, Mark hatched more project ideas and was basically ready for me when my marriage nuked out and I hopped a bus back to Montreal (my wife had totalled my car, but that's another story).

So I started in the old 2much offices 6 years ago learning first the programs to do what I wanted to do, and then new things you could do on the web. But the video thing was a little too ambitious, and I started wondering how come search engines had nothing about us... which took me back to words, and writing...

Question #
Whatís it like dealing with J.D. Obenberger?

J.D. is a great guy, a scholar, a gentleman, insanely knowledgeable, has great taste (he loved Montreal) and is an engaging, fun conversationalist.

But he must be a beast in the court room when he goes to trial.

When you're on the hungover from hell and you're on a seminar where he's challenging you on how you manage international 2257 compliance on what you flippantly termed "'s Dynamic 2257 Record Keeping System" in the post John Ashcroft revision era without breaking the law and you already have a hard time explaining it to yourself, he will make you cry.

It was of course the day after the infamous lipstickman FUBAR incident.

Y'see, our software customers can be both primary and secondary producers, which before the revisions was simple. After Ashcroft, and we had about 30 days to scramble a solution to keep all our platform clients compliant, it was very complicated.

Because you're both primary and secondary custodian of records, because it depends on whether the performer is from your site or from our MBase shared talent pool.

Because, in Canada and other countries, our constitution protects our right to privacy and prevents employers from sharing our private data.

Because US webmasters had the option of accepting or refusing a performer from the LiveCamNetwork MBase system whose 2257 info was blocked with a disclaimer pending a request from the DoJ or FBI.

And so on.

So I wanted to explain all this and the basics behind our performer sharing network, and it seemed (to my boondoggled mind and no doubt to everyone in the room) like irrelevant, promotional preamble, J.D. was asking "How" and "What do you mean" every half-pause I took...

Later people did tell me he seemed a little pitiless... I don't know, 2much had him for supper later and I talked to him about it and we laughed and it was no big deal. I think he was just concerned about what our company particularly was promising clients and the industry, and he's always been passionate about the ways the government seems want to nit-pick us out of business and the weaknesses we can present them...

I love J.D. J.D. loves me.

I know Mark has a great pic somewhere :P

Question #
Discuss acid trips, cocaine, and weed.

Acid... hmmm... ok, well it's an "environmental" drug - depends where you are, when you are, who you're with... and can turn into a great trip or a bad trip.

It was hard to find good acid in the mid-90's and I gave up on it... but when I first started tripping with deadheads and writing intensely, it was the end of the Owsley era, and still the acid that was a true, 48-hour, intellectual mind trip. It was replaced by cheaper lower doses and speed-inflected formulas and crappy superficial pre-ecstasy style barrels and tabs.

I had one of the best, life-changing experiences in my life on some Owsley tabs.

And subsequently learned NOT to do acid with people you didn't start the trip with, or weren't completely in synch with.

Cocaine was a mistake that became a life-changing habit and vicious circle due to the DJ lifestyle, which I covered a little earlier. My friend and journalism partner Andy once said that coke turns everyone who uses it into a liar and schemer. Obviously it's not the drug itself because lots of people try it and drop it. It's the user, and in my case it was the user, and lifestyle. I had to drop it because I would have had my legs broken otherwise... and, one day, I promised to someone I love I would never touch it again, and I haven't.

Weed I abused when I was younger but it never affected anything in my life. Weed should be legal. I used it during those peer-pressure, initiative years of youth and never liked it, and when I was a security guard (our security crew were the suppliers for the whole mall) I used so much of it I developed an allergy, or negative reaction - whenever I've used it since, it is the ultimate soporific. It makes me sleep, regardless of whether it's indica or sativa. I snooze. I'll know what to do if I ever become insomniac.

But pot is harmless and 420 should be a national holiday, just because to me weed represents the ridiculous, repressive and arbitrary government policies enacted for political or politically strategic reasons without reason - I mean, it's still schedule one, on par with heroin and coke - like do you really think kids develop trust in elders and society after that?

I am polemic, lookitthat :P

Question #
Solar eclipse in Mexico?

Fuck yeah!

We went down to cover it for a magazine.

We were going to do it in the northern baja but found out the longest eclipse time was going to be in LaPaz, the southern end of the Baja peninsula.

It was a twenty-four-hour bus-ride. Three laughing, joshing, grinning Mexican drivers with Tres Estrellas buslines and perfect teeth in eight-hour shifts who were very competent but made us nervous. They laughed with their heads thrown back, eyes closed, whenever we were rounding cliff-side blacktops without guard-railings... played a constant stream of mariachi muzic that always featured the word "Corazon" (heart, in spanish) and stopped only when they came across a liquor-shop/taco-stand...

That's when we hit the hard stuff. Just to make it through the wood-plank bus seats and endless mexican love tunes...

I have a theory now that all spanish music or songs use "corazon" somewhere in there... test it for yourselves.

So when we got down to LaPaz we rented a room from a spooky old dude with a beard and a respirator who laid in a wheeled hospital bed from the time he opened the flaky green painted door to when he showed us our room. He didn't tell us about the cult of cockroaches that worshipped a giant mutant roach in our bathroom at night if we closed the light. That was the last we saw of our booze, we came back from a good local taqueria the next day and it was all gone.

So we slept on the beach two nights which was cool because this troupe of mystical wild dogs would find us and cuddle up next to us both nights as if they knew we needed warmth.

The eclipse rocked. The light spectrum shifted, the roosters crowed, the horses neighed, and the ants marched back to their nests in a straight line... freaky. Then the sun disappeared and the planets all lined up together beneath the corona - we could see them all because of the reduced light. Like a pearl necklace... and hundreds of people who had gathered to see this cheered across the landscape around us all at once...

Then we had to backpack it back up north.... referred to earlier.

The article was five typed pages, and very expressionistic. The editor's reply with "fixes" was about ten. Our reply was forty pages with justifications. Ultimately we turned down their 400 dollar fee and published a great piece in an indy poetry journal, of all places...

Fuck'em if they can't take the truth.

Question #
Foursomes? Public sex? Viagra? Discuss.

I'm an old fashioned kinda guy when it comes to sex, it has to be one on one. And I've had the experiences to prove it to myself.

So when that cougarish chick in the bar was telling me and my buddy weren't "man enough" to fuck her and her plain but sweet looking friend who was getting married the next week... well... you can sort of imagine where that led...

And I just didn't enjoy it, it was more sex as sport than sex as pleasure, just empty blah bof...

Public sex: it never occurred to me but sometimes at the right time and the right place with the right girl.... hehehh. But it ain't all it's cracked up to be.

Fucking on beaches and haystacks and elevators LOOKS great, but things in reality ain't. In sand, getting just a little bit in the wrong place is excruciating, and getting hay in your pussy cannot be pleasant judging by what it felt like in my butt crack... and even when your in a stall in a men's room with the hottest babe in the world bent over in front of you, it's hard to stay inspired when listening to guys piss and fart and sigh and belch around you lol.

Viagra: never tried it, hear i don't need it. Except in men's rooms :P

Question #
Mardi-gras seems to have some meaning to you, expand please.

It's not Mardi-gras as much as New Orleans. The city probably has more history and culture and music going through it than any place on the continent, the feeling is everywhere, in the very air. At least the feeling was there before Katrina. Haven't been back after the floods.

Mardi-gras the festival is another thing. The parades and krewes are great, but the place gets more crowded and unpleasantly rowdy the closer to Fat Tuesday you get. You gotta head out to the small towns, out of the city, to truly enjoy the festival day's real fun.

Had some of my best times there, then. Also interviewed the president of Tabasco company, and Dave Landry, the production supervisor guy who's picture is on every box of Tabasco sauce sold, holding a clip board and checking the barrels.

Question #
What was it like to watch your kids being born?

Beautiful and transcendent, burned in my mind forever, the most awesome experience in my life. I didn't expect the feeling. One of those don't-know-whether-to-laugh-or-cry moments, but... bigger.

I recommend any expectant dad to be there when it happens. You won't understand until it happens.

Also, I've never seen anyone in so much pain as a woman delivering a child. Kudos, ladies, you're tougher than we are ;)

Question #
Why didnít you get paid in college to type other peopleís papers?

Well I charged people to write their papers, but never to type'em. Typing papers pays so little you gotta do it in mass quantity, and I did it basically for the practice, I wanted to be a speedtypist on a manual, 'cause I hated handwriting when I wrote my stuff. So I wanted it to go straight from my brain to the sheet of paper, Zenning out on the tool in between...

When I started on computers it was insane. I top at above 120 words a minute in English. I'm sure it's more, that was tested years ago on an IBM Selectric, so...

Question #
 Where do you live and why? Always lived there?

Montreal. Born and raised and schooled and work here. I wouldn't live anywhere else. Except maybe on the road, constantly travelling between connection points.

Question #
What do you like most about the adult industry? The least?

Most? the creativity - because of the content, we can pretty much get away with all kinds of experimental, far out stuff, good or bad - at least we tried 

The fun. The informality. I already posted about the communality. The playfulness. This thread and concept are a case in point.

The people in general, some people in particular! The acceptance towards newbies and new things.

The open-mindedness, overall, and tolerance for weird.

And last but not least.... The Beauties!

The Least?
The small splinter-snob groups who think they're above the rest.

The carpetbaggers, the people from outside the industry who are welcomed in and think they have a thing or two to teach us, or think they know anything about it.

Because of the general acceptance and tolerance in Adult, "straight" or mainstream people often come in thinking to make a quick-buck and assume we're "just" pornographers and somehow below them in morals, ethics and BRAINS. And the industry is patient.... but when they don't turn out well, they end up scammers or just a shitload of trouble.

The leeches, just out to get laid, or "party like a pornstar".

Question #
Do you own or rent/lease your home(s) and car(s). Discuss, pics.

Nah I rent a tawdry small apartment because I was in a hurry 2 years ago and I didn't have much choice. Since then I've been lazy about getting a new place because I choose to work too much lol

I owned one car in my life, and that was a Jeep Cherokee when I lived in the country; in the city I'm a walker/biker/bus-taker.

Question #
Talk about some of the stories you wrote.

I remember the weirdest place I got fiction published was a Christian Ladies' Magazine. It was a relatively gentle story, about an old woman scared of the progressing world waiting for her baby to come back from an outing with a young man. Like an O'Henry story, it ends with a twist.

The weirdest story I ever wrote was a surreal tale of aliens and their world called "Slurpglop", in Aboriginal Science Fiction.

In journalism I remember doing all the caves of Virginia over three days for Richmond magazine. We didn't have an expense account, but we didn't spend a thing on lodging or food and drink, the owners and keepers of the caves were great guests.

One truly weird tear-sheet we got in the mail was all in Japanese, and I didn't know what the hell that was about until I spotted ournames in the byline and realized it was a Japanese Bluegrass magazine we'd resold the Jerry Garcia Banjo piece to...

Those are off the top of my head...

Question #
How many fights have you been in? discuss

Fights? I'm a lover, not a fighter....

A few, not many, let's just say more than some, less than others... Never started by myself, usually ended by myself, although I've had a few poundings.

A gentleman neither kisses and tells, nor punches and gloats (or counts).

Question #
If you weren't in online adult, what would you be doing instead?

I don't know it sometimes seems I keep drifting back to sex somehow... stripclubs, porn...

But ideally I'd churning out screenplays and making movies. I was heading in that direction with some assignments, and produced, wrote and directed a couple music videos for local bands, one of which ended up on MuchMusic (Canada's MTV) but not really in rotation...

Question #24
Where do you see yourself in the next 5, 10 and 20 years?

Well 2much is pretty much a place I'd never split up with if it goes the way I see it going. Growth will see me maybe heading a department for the company or a division. If we can automate much of our processes, get some outsource going, and free us up for more creative stuff, we'll have people doing our repping and selling for us. Maybe we'll produce the ultimate hardcore sci-fi horror movie.

I'm also considering starting a small non-competing company on the side to optimize and lighten sites for better rendered search engine representation, among other services.

I don't see myself retiring or dropping out as long as there's stuff to learn. I don't see myself as dropping out of adult unless there's some real good pickings made available.

The future's open. I see either a nice house on a beach or a green field, and an intense work set-up, with my kids playing outside or coming to visit with their kids, or a never ending series of cities and towns and hotels and an intense travelling work station lol.

I'm open too.

Question #25
What companies do you despise in this industry? Which ones do you love? (other than your own)

I don't really hate any companies since is pretty much its own service provider on most levels... but even if there were, I may like the people there, or feel that it's not appropriate to dis them in public like this.

In fact there are companies you can hate or like, but the people you feel the opposite about - or most everyone who uses them are satisfied, so it's not really my place.

The companies that are despised for whatever reason are usually despised, in time, by everyone, and ignored, ostracised or litigated off the scene. Let them die their own deaths.

And I'm serious when I say that there really aren't any companies that I hate, per se.

But for companies I love, well, and I think I might miss some here, there's the good people at TMM, one-man companies like MyWifeBucks' JimmiDean or Qwebec Expo's Michel Plante - who both have their awesome wives supporting them btw.

I'm gonna stop there lol. If we used MojoHosting I could probably say I love that company, but really it's all about the people, so I don't know how to answer your question.

I think there's enough shit being thrown at us and negative perceptions from the mainstream without coming out with intercine nastiness... unless it's truly deserved :P

Question #26
Talk about the ketchup mustard thing.

OKAY okay ok .... The kethcup mustard thingl.

Let's have a little preamble on this, shall we?

First of all, most of you are aware of the night I passed out standing up at the bar in Montreal during Webmaster Access East.


And it all started with a plastic cup. Someone balanced it on my head and took a picture... I didn't wake up.

So it happened again. And again.

And someone grabbed a lipstick and wrote a URL on my head... and more pictures...

The more I stood there, the more people wrote stuff in lipstick on my head and the more pictures were taken.

I heard that people were blinded by all the flashes going off for about forty minutes.

Anyhow, it was real...

A lot of people thought (as early as last year) that it was a put-up job between me and MiichaelP....

I was grilled about it too... and after awhile I just told people - you decide.

It turned into a brilliant piece of guerrilla marketing.A year later, I was drunk outta my head... a bad piece of history for me. Drunk the whole show, almost... and the roomy I had had a girlfriend...

[to be continued]

Question #27
Why do you shave yoor head? Are you going bald?

Mostly for hygiene reasons. People with hair are dirty...

And yes I started going bald.... but was never a fan of "taking care" of my hair so I shaved it. Now, I can frrt dry it like a tooth brush after a shower and be ready to offend in a matter of minutes.

I did it once not thinking I'd keep doing it... but I have such a nice skull...

Question #28
Talk about the time when you lost a sale at internext and why you got so mad.


I won't name names cause the thief is no longer in the business but he fucking screwed me out of about three grand and a lot more that I was expecting out of that sale... concerning my kids and my lodgings and more....

Basically when I think of it and write of it I become incensed...

Anyhow the thief was sorta working with us on a promisory of sales. He brought his lovely girlfriend with him, who wasn't in the business (too bad). BUT he sucked at sales that weekend and he wanted to take her shopping in south beach. So when I went to the CyberSocket party and talked to a lot of people but encountered this cool dude who became our client... all seemed fine. He just wanted a final handshake with Mark, the owner, and basically joshed with us around the pool until Mark got there.

But unbeknownst to me, the thief had slipped my guy a business card and basically used his email to send a contract.... so when accounting hit it they sent him the 3k commission...

What pisses me off so much is that as well as the fact that 2much gave me a $500 bonus for the sale, the paperwork, chekcs and so on had already gone through and he was already paid, off and on his way, knowing he'd snagged a contract and sale from under me because he shot out the first email.

Scumbag isn't in the business any more ( read what I wrote earlier about carpetbaggers ) but it still fucked up a lot of things for me AND he basically ripped off 2much by claiming my commission.... mainstream MLM scammers stay in your realm from now on or I will become incensed... pissed off... very fucking angry... try again, please... Make My Day...

Question #29
Why was 2008 such a hard year for your business?

Who said it was such a hard year?

Sales went down, we experimented with price packages, sales went up, how do I know?

Not my department, if it's even true...

Question #30
Do you ever expect to become a partner? What would it take for this to happen?

I don't *expect* to become a partner but I do plan to keep my implication in the company as deep as it can be...

Besides, Mark has exquisite nipples, and your new hairless back is a complete turn on for males or females... I don't see how I could escape this madness ...




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